It wasn’t exactly a perfect demolition, but D.C. United will take wins any way they come, and these days the wins are coming in bunches.

D.C. United won its fourth in five after beating San Jose, 3-1, on Sunday. Another comfortable win for a D.C. team that has moved past an awful start to the season and now looks like the powerhouse so many thought they would be before the season.

San Jose is also living up to, or perhaps living down to, pre-season expectations, dropping its fifth loss in eight matches. The expansion blues are under way by the Bay and there doesn’t appear to be any relief on the horizon.

SBI correspondents Joel Sanderson and Kevin Matthiessen took in the action on Sunday and provided us with the following perspectives on the match:

Fairy tale time for streaking D.C.

By JOEL SANDERSON

A whole new world

A new fantastic point of view

No one to tell us no

Or where to go

Or say we’re only dreaming

I could go on. I have a beautiful voice.

I could pull out my lyre and become the minstrel of DC United, following wherever it went singing the praises and telling the tales.

Oh, DC United, the valiant hero. With great expectations the season began, dreams of world-shattering goals and heroic saves.

Ah but what have we learned, but that there were few heroic saves and for weeks, DC United was lost in the woods, fighting internal demons.

But the battle was worthwhile. It is important for every knight to go into battle full of self-awareness and luminescence. DC lacked that, losing battles that it was not worthy to fight, as though Brave Sir Robin had taken to the field.

And then, just when all was lost, when the crowd began to jeer, calling for its head, the new star showed up. The crowd cheered for Toronto FC. “

“(G)oh Canada!” they sang.

Some expect that that moment might mean ‘off with the head’ for DC United. But it was not to be. DC had learned that it had not been playing to its strengths. The dragon of Toronto need not be guarded against, but attacked!

And attack DC did, throwing player after player at the Toronto defense. Self-awareness at last.

The Screaming Eagles let out a mighty roar that could only mean one thing: “Watch the #%@* out.”

But fellow knights and enemies failed to heed the warning. Indeed, I at times wavered.

“Will they make through the year?” I pondered.

But they did. Against the best of the best, New England and Chicago, DC would not be pushed aside. The old beating heart that once seemed to be beating oh, so, slowly, because to quicken. Soon enough it was veritably thumping!

And now, with penetrating attacks of confident passes, Sir DC United has once again climbed towards the peaks of greatness.

Last week, the dregs of the kingdom came to the DC house, willing to do anything to sway the battle.

And DC’s Achilles Heel became known. Paris perched at the top tower, ready to throw down his arrow. As though attempting to learn that confounding game of “volleyball,” Sir Zach Wells dreamed of being the Black Knight. And so that he became.

DC’s armor is still weak, of aluminum not iron. The Earthquakes, they dented many a time and, if not for finishing skill more fit for two invalid children with wooden sticks, many holes may have been pierced.

Ah, but it was not to be. For DC pushed onwards and took a shot that may have pierced the very soul of the opponent. The opponent was angry, bitter, unwilling to return kindly to the hole of muck and mud in which it lives.

James Riley lashed out with cowardly attack of karmic personal destruction. Ah, but Lord claimed immediate retribution. ‘Twas sad to see him in pain, I admit. I wish him the best, and morals too.

But now, this tale is nearing an end, though just for a moment. The battle versus the Los Angeles Galaxy will be epic. Strength against weakness and the bulwarks may break. Which break will release the greatest deluge? Ah, that I do not claim to know. All I can say is that this battle will be climactic, but not the only climax of this tale.

Remember dear Galaxy. ‘Tis DC United that defends the chastity of women and the righteousness of man. So no matter the result, DC shall sentry on until all have been vanquished. That is the tale I sing.

Road woes continue for Earthquakes

By KEVIN MATTHIESSEN

The Earthquakes picked up another goose egg on the road Sunday when they met D.C. United at R.F.K. Stadium. Though the game was being aired on the worst quality channel and I wouldn’t understand what the commentators were talking about, save for peloto, falte, goal, and a scant few others, I was very excited to watch it. Were the Earthquakes going to pull off a good result to capture at least a point? My heart said yes but my head said no. Coming off a good road point down a man on the green painted cement at Salt Lake, the roller coaster-o-meter was pointing towards the lose side.

After a 0-0 first half, I was very encouraged that they just might be able to hold on for a point or even sneak in a lucky strike for the full three points.  Then after the 50th minutes, those hopes were dashed. But wait. Could it be? The ‘Quakes suddenly got lucky. After less than a minute later, John Cunliffe was in the right place at the right time to clean up after a Zach Wells gaffe.

Even though Bryan Namoff saved the ball from hitting the back of the net, there was little doubt in my mind that the ball crossed the line for the goal as I jumped from my couch and narrowly averted getting my hair chopped off by our ceiling fan. I was amazed at the luck they’ve had for the second week in a row now (see offside call vs. RSL). Could the expansion tides of luck finally be changing?

The answer is a resounding no. After the ninety minutes had gone, the Earthquakes found another way to lose. This time it was primarily via the deflection as Clyde Simms and Luciano Emilio both hit shots that would have otherwise been easily saved. The other goal by D.C. United however was a brilliant strike by Colombian defender Gonzalo Martinez.

So there we have it. Another (not) good (enough) performance by the Earthquakes, another 0 points on the board, and Los Terremotos still firmly rooted to the foot of the table.

Since the roller coaster had just hit a low point, maybe there’s hope for next week’s match vs. Chicago at Bridgeview. But maybe not. I do know one thing however, we’re sure to be entertained with the dynamic duo of John Shrader and Troy Dayak in the broadcast booth.

John: "You know Troy, Gavin Glinton’s sister’s best friend’s cousin’s mother is Faith Hill’s fitness trainer."

Troy (with a disinterested apathetic monotone): "Gee John, I don’t know how or why you come up with this stuff."